RECOGNIZING HURTING PEOPLE: By Creflo Dollar
“It is not difficult to recognize hurting people. You can detect signs of hurt and emotional pain fairly easily if you pay attention.
First, hurting people are very unpleasant to be around. Have you ever known people who are always negative? Their words, demeanor, and attitude seem to reflect a constant state of dissatisfaction with everyone and everything around them. They are always finding a way to weave the hurts of “their pasts into their conversations. I have encountered many people like this, and it is clear that hurt is lurking just beneath the surface of their emotions.
Second, when people are hurting, they tend to be angry not only at others but also with themselves. Their anger usually turns inward and manifests as depression and stress. Consequently, they may have a short fuse or react to people and situations with harsh words. A hurt person may act out on the anger they feel by lashing out at others and trying to inflict the same pain they feel on the world around them.
Because of the anger a lot of hurting people feel, they tend to wear their emotions on their sleeve. Sometimes they do this so you can start a conversation that allows them to tell you about their pain. Hurting people are also extremely sensitive and very defensive. They often feel that they are being attacked, even when this is not the case at all.
The third signpost of a hurting person is bad decision making. It is so important to avoid making decisions when you are hurt because the decisions “you make will most likely be wrong. It is unwise to make choices simply to protect our feelings in the heat of the moment rather than in the best interest of our future. Decisions that are made based on hurt feelings can be costly.
When I was growing up, my dad, who was known as Big Dollar, was a no-nonsense type of man. Quite simply, he was emotionally led most of the time. He worked as a police officer. One particular night he called in sick, and a coworker decided to show up at our house because my dad did not come in to work that night. The police officer banged on our door at two o’clock in the morning, and my father was not happy, to say the least! They exchanged words, and, needless to say, my dad gave him a few more moments to leave the property before taking matters into his own hands! The next thing we heard was the squad car squealing off down the street. I am sure my dad would have killed that guy because his emotions controlled his actions. This is how I was raised. My family let our emotions rule our decisions.
Many of us can recall at least one time when we have made the mistake of making a decision based “on hurt feelings. Later, we ended up regretting most of those actions. We cannot think clearly, rationally, and objectively when we are hurt, so the best thing to do is to take some time to step away from whatever the situation may be and regain our footing emotionally. Ask yourself, How is this decision going to affect my life? Am I going to regret this later? If the answer is yes, it is definitely not the time to move forward with that particular decision.” A Book by Creflo Dollar. “Winning Over Negative Emotions
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